...or lack thereof.
I work with quite the cast of characters.
Conversations include, but are not limited to, my coworker's open marriage, monogamy, religion (two of my coworkers are atheists), legalizing drugs, etc. Whoa. There have been several conversations where we've had to just agree to disagree.
Needless to say, I've learned a lot about people and myself. I've learned to hold my own and explain my opinion. I've learned to be fully informed on a topic to be able to back up my beliefs. It has really challenged my thinking. I'm no longer constantly surrounded by my safety net of college friends. I've met people who are absolutely, 100% different from me and it has broadened my approach to interacting with people.
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Strapping on the hiking gear again
I thought I was getting glimpses of the top of the mountain.
I think I had just found a plateau...
I rested there for a little bit... a false sense of clarity. Then I realized there was more climbing to do. There IS more climbing to do.
The plateau was good for a while. God was with me again. I found pieces of purpose again. It seemed to be good. But it was just better than the messy valley I had been in. So much more good awaits me.
I know there is still some hurt ahead, but I will not feel bad fighting for myself to find healing and restoration. Its not wrong and I'm seeing that now. Its okay to fight for myself too.
I think I had just found a plateau...
I rested there for a little bit... a false sense of clarity. Then I realized there was more climbing to do. There IS more climbing to do.
The plateau was good for a while. God was with me again. I found pieces of purpose again. It seemed to be good. But it was just better than the messy valley I had been in. So much more good awaits me.
I know there is still some hurt ahead, but I will not feel bad fighting for myself to find healing and restoration. Its not wrong and I'm seeing that now. Its okay to fight for myself too.
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Where did August go?
In the last month and a half since updating...
1. Sawyer Marie Birkenfeld was born and is the most precious thing in the world.
2. I moved into my own apartment.
3. My sister finished grad school in Austin and left to go back to Florida.
4. I had a job interview... still no verdict.
5. I survived my very first power outages of living alone during a lightning storm.
6. I've learned to live without constant internet access or cable. (Just found a spot in my apartment tonight where I've got some internet action)
7. I've 3 great books... and am on my 4th.
8. God showed up in huge ways and I finally feel like there's an end to this season of drought.
1. Sawyer Marie Birkenfeld was born and is the most precious thing in the world.
2. I moved into my own apartment.
3. My sister finished grad school in Austin and left to go back to Florida.
4. I had a job interview... still no verdict.
5. I survived my very first power outages of living alone during a lightning storm.
6. I've learned to live without constant internet access or cable. (Just found a spot in my apartment tonight where I've got some internet action)
7. I've 3 great books... and am on my 4th.
8. God showed up in huge ways and I finally feel like there's an end to this season of drought.
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Where in the world is...
...my latest blog update? (the carmen sandiego theme song is now on repeat in my head)
Working, playing, packing, oh my!
It sometimes feels like all I do in a week is go to work, eat, and come home to sleep before starting over. Now, really, that is not true, but I have been working a lot which is good for paying the bills, but bad for my sleep schedule. I'm still on the hunt for a full-time-this-is-what-my-degree's-for job and even got one step further with an interview. It went well; they chose someone with more experience.. who can blame them? But they did mention two other positions opening soon that they will consider me for as well, which is cool. I went home for a quick trip the last weekend of June for a wedding which was a ton of fun! I'm so glad that Rachael's and my path didn't stop crossing in high school and we got to extend our friendship through college. She was a stunning bride and hosted a rockin' reception! I'm getting ready to move into my own apartment on July 22 and am very excited! I'm looking forward to a pretty big "growing up" step in my life and figuring out the living alone season of my life. I have an awesome comfy couch for visitor's though!
Working, playing, packing, oh my!
It sometimes feels like all I do in a week is go to work, eat, and come home to sleep before starting over. Now, really, that is not true, but I have been working a lot which is good for paying the bills, but bad for my sleep schedule. I'm still on the hunt for a full-time-this-is-what-my-degree's-for job and even got one step further with an interview. It went well; they chose someone with more experience.. who can blame them? But they did mention two other positions opening soon that they will consider me for as well, which is cool. I went home for a quick trip the last weekend of June for a wedding which was a ton of fun! I'm so glad that Rachael's and my path didn't stop crossing in high school and we got to extend our friendship through college. She was a stunning bride and hosted a rockin' reception! I'm getting ready to move into my own apartment on July 22 and am very excited! I'm looking forward to a pretty big "growing up" step in my life and figuring out the living alone season of my life. I have an awesome comfy couch for visitor's though!
Monday, June 15, 2009
life lyrics
"For as much as she stumbles she's runnin'
For as much as she runs she's still here
Always hoping to find something quicker than heaven
To make the damage of her days disappear"
...and so goes the lyrics to a popularly-played country song these days. you may have heard of it- guinevere by eli young band.
i feel like this chorus speaks volumes about my heart/life right now in so many ways. as i'm doing this whole transition out of college and figuring out real life, i'm seeing the wrong turns i've taken and how they're affecting me now. (oh the beauty of hindsight) i'm seeing how the falls and spills of my life have shaped who i am daily in good ways and bad. yet, i still carry on each day, still learning and figuring out my way... feeling like and knowing that i'm a very different person than i was just a year ago (let alone four years before college), but also seeing that i'm in the same place and learning some things over and over again. i know in the end it will all be good, but some days i can't help but feel tired of the changing and processing as i try to find a faster answer.
For as much as she runs she's still here
Always hoping to find something quicker than heaven
To make the damage of her days disappear"
...and so goes the lyrics to a popularly-played country song these days. you may have heard of it- guinevere by eli young band.
i feel like this chorus speaks volumes about my heart/life right now in so many ways. as i'm doing this whole transition out of college and figuring out real life, i'm seeing the wrong turns i've taken and how they're affecting me now. (oh the beauty of hindsight) i'm seeing how the falls and spills of my life have shaped who i am daily in good ways and bad. yet, i still carry on each day, still learning and figuring out my way... feeling like and knowing that i'm a very different person than i was just a year ago (let alone four years before college), but also seeing that i'm in the same place and learning some things over and over again. i know in the end it will all be good, but some days i can't help but feel tired of the changing and processing as i try to find a faster answer.
Sunday, May 24, 2009
what i learned in college
1. god is real
2. good friendships are hard, but worth the fight
3. you don't hurt family
4. life's not about what you learn in a classroom
5. i'm not in control
6. sometimes its easier to ask for forgiveness later than for permission first
normally, i'd expand on these things.. share a funny story of something dumb i did to learn them or an anecdote of why these things are important. however, this list is in no way all-inclusive nor am i done figuring them all out. so, for now, that is it... a short list of some big ideas that i learned about in the last four years.
2. good friendships are hard, but worth the fight
3. you don't hurt family
4. life's not about what you learn in a classroom
5. i'm not in control
6. sometimes its easier to ask for forgiveness later than for permission first
normally, i'd expand on these things.. share a funny story of something dumb i did to learn them or an anecdote of why these things are important. however, this list is in no way all-inclusive nor am i done figuring them all out. so, for now, that is it... a short list of some big ideas that i learned about in the last four years.
Thursday, May 7, 2009
every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end
http://egan.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/05/06/dear-graduate/
^a good article for graduates... for everyone. its advice for life.
highlights from the article:
-do one thing everyday that scares you.
-learn to cook.
-avoid phony controversies.
-volunteer.
-nourish your friendships.
if i could add my own things to the list:
-make a decision purely for yourself. just because you want to even if it makes others upset/disappointed/etc. there have been a handful of decisions i have made in college just because i wanted to do something. i thought for myself, weighed the pros and cons, and went for it. i have never regretted them once and they have helped me gain confidence and boldness in myself.
-love people hard. without second thought. intentionally. show grace and mercy to people even when you're hurt. be compassionate. care about others.
-be purposeful. do things with a reason. be intentional in relating to others... listen for the answer when you ask how people are. make goals.
-leave work at the office. i don't want my job to ever define my life more than loving god and people. so while its possible to be intentional at the office, don't bring the work junk home, to your dinner plans, to your friends, etc
i didn't know this day would ever come... the last day i ever have to walk into a classroom as a student. i don't plan on ever doing it again! no inkling of grad school here- i am done.
^a good article for graduates... for everyone. its advice for life.
highlights from the article:
-do one thing everyday that scares you.
-learn to cook.
-avoid phony controversies.
-volunteer.
-nourish your friendships.
if i could add my own things to the list:
-make a decision purely for yourself. just because you want to even if it makes others upset/disappointed/etc. there have been a handful of decisions i have made in college just because i wanted to do something. i thought for myself, weighed the pros and cons, and went for it. i have never regretted them once and they have helped me gain confidence and boldness in myself.
-love people hard. without second thought. intentionally. show grace and mercy to people even when you're hurt. be compassionate. care about others.
-be purposeful. do things with a reason. be intentional in relating to others... listen for the answer when you ask how people are. make goals.
-leave work at the office. i don't want my job to ever define my life more than loving god and people. so while its possible to be intentional at the office, don't bring the work junk home, to your dinner plans, to your friends, etc
i didn't know this day would ever come... the last day i ever have to walk into a classroom as a student. i don't plan on ever doing it again! no inkling of grad school here- i am done.
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